I'm having a hard time cleaning my office. Can I use EFT to help from being distracted and just get the job done?
One of my clients recently, "Julie" was about to start packing up her office as she quit her job as she was moving on to set out to follow work that was her souls longing. I offered the following suggestion, "Before you clean your office sit in the middle of the mess and tune into the mess. See if it has anything to tell you about how you feel about the transition you are going to make. If there are any emotions that arise from this, simply pay attention to them. If any of them are undesirable emotions, take some time to do EFT on them before you start to clean the office." Often the emotions we feel about a person, place, or situation is really what we feel about ourselves projected into the world. The thought being we can't make a change in the world until we make the change in our self, even if the task is as small as cleaning an office.
He is what she later wrote about the experience on her blog:
"Yesterday I received some wisdom from a friend regarding the only item on my to-do list this week…cleaning and packing my office. His advice was to tune myself in to the mess, let it speak to me, let any emotions related to the mess come to the surface and pay attention to them, acknowledge them, and then clean them.
"Having said that, I completely disregarded his advice when I got to the office this morning because I had done an amazing job on the drive in convincing myself that the state of my office is clearly about a lack of shelf space and couldn’t possibly be emotional, a reflection of myself, etcetera, on any level.
"Forty minutes into my cleaning and packing project all I had done was rearrange piles. Not one paper clip was packed. Not one piece of paper tossed in the recycle bin. I plunked myself onto my pleather sofa, took a few deep breaths, and started to tune myself in to the space around me. And it began to speak. My bookshelf told me one thing. My desk told me another. The enormous box of Christmas lights whispered that I am really afraid that by choosing to leave my current job I am going to be left with a giant void of laughter in my life if I don’t spend time with teenagers on a regular basis. Who knew Christmas lights were so insightful? The wall in front of my desk covered in pictures, quotes, and notes, spoke very clearly about the struggle of managing long distance relationships. Little by little I was able to acknowledge and clean the feelings around cleaning my office…and as a result I made a serious dent in packing things up. By the time I got to the stack of paintings leaning against the wall, my perspective had completely shifted. (Sometimes we don’t want to hear what things, situations, or relationships have to say.) But now I was ready, even eager to keep moving forward. I will admit that I was tempted to take the artwork and spread it out around the room but I had at some point chosen to stack them in a pile way back when and needed to pay attention to that.
"So I did.
"And this is what was revealed…
"Don’t be afraid. You are an artist in bloom."
Now, did the mess, the desk, the walls, or the paintings really talk? They talked no more or less then when I ask my clients, "If the pain in your knee could say something, what would it say right now to you?"
Did the information come for outside or with in? In my mind it doesn't matter, but by tuning in and listening Julie was able to find emotions she was feeling about her transition. Before they were sitting under the surface. They were hiding (or she was just refusing to hear them). By tuning in a different ways (admittedly a very different way) she was able to get more information about feelings that needed to be healed before she could move on.
From time to time I suggest this to my clients. The process is very.
1) Sit in a place you spend a great deal of time (office, kitchen, bedroom, or car)
2) Tune into the area around you
3) Ask if the car/desk/table/wall could say something, what would it say.
4) If something arises do EFT. It is not so much a matter of doing EFT on what you were tuning into, but what ever emotion has just grown in yourself.
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Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
August 28, 2007
August 1, 2007
Making It Routine
I love EFT, but find it hard to remember to use EFT. Do you have any suggestions to help me remember to us EFT regularly?
It is very funny. When friends, family and clients are sharing with me something that has happened in the past week, I almost always ask, "Did you tap in it?" Inevitably they respond, "I always forget."
Initially, in my practice, I found that very few clients where doing the homework we had agreed upon. As I started to investigate this, generally the response was as simple as, "I forgot." In response to this, I started to not only give homework, but give the time they should be doing the home work (e.g. sitting in the car before walking in to work, right before bed, while taking a morning walk).
Basically, with out saying this, we were creating an EFT routine. Here is an example of a routine for one of my clients "Jane".
Jane works for an agency that places and supports children in the foster care system. It is a job that can be emotional at times because of the nature of their clients. It is stressful because they are trying to do so much with limited resources. Because of this Jane was taking quite a bit of anxiousness home from work.
The routine we created was very simple. Each day before she left work she would make a stop in the restroom. She would go into one of the stalls and do EFT for five to ten minutes. She would address any emotions she had at that moment, as well as take a quick review of the day to see if there was anything she needed to clean up. Then, symbolically, she would flush the toilet to show her self that she had gotten rid of all the carp she was carrying around.
We very intentionally chose her work place as the place she was going to do the work. Her concern was that she was bringing the emotion from work home with her. We very easily could have had her waited until she got home before she did the work. There are two problems with this. First, by waiting until she got home she was bringing the emotion home (which is what we were trying to fix). Second, it was very easy to get distracted when she got home. There was the dog to take care of, her husband to greet and spend time with and dinner to fix. It would be very easy to get distracted with all that was happening at home and not get to the EFT work she needed to do.
By having her do the EFT at her work place we were able to take care of both of these problems. First, doing the EFT at work, all of the emotion associated with the job was not leaving work. Second, by making it part of her exit routine from the office there was no way she was going to get distracted from the doing EFT. It simply became one more step to getting out the door, like turning off her computer, packing her back, and turning the voice mail on.
Here are a few things to consider when creating an EFT routine.
1) Do it at the same time everyday.
There are going to be moments when we need to do EFT right now, but for the most part we are able to deal with most things with some time set aside for work. Look at how well we brush our teeth. Every night before we go to bed, the last thing we all do is brush our teeth. I know I don't think why I am doing, it is just part of the routine. It is much easier to do any sort of maintenance for hour health when it is done at a regular time. This is true for brushing our teeth, going to the gym, or doing EFT.
2) Do it in the same place every time.
Now this might be possible, but I have found it is very helpful to have a consistent location. I have a special chair in which I do all of my prayer, meditation, and EFT in. The only thing I use the chair for is these activities. Because I have set space aside for these activities, the moment I start moving towards my body, mind, and spirit know what is coming. I immediately start to feel relaxed because I know what is coming next.
You don't have to have a special place in which the only thing you do there is EFT, but by having a consistent location (in bed, the kitchen table, the porch swing) you more likely to do it.
Also, it is important to pick a place where you are not going to be distracted. In the living room, while the kids are watching TV might not be the best choice.
3) Have a game plan when you sit down.
I have found it helpful to have a plan when I sit down to do EFT. For me it looks something like this. First, I scan my body for any aches and pains and do work on them first. Second, I review my day to see what residual emotions are kicking around. Third, I think about what is happening tomorrow. I see if I am worried about what is to come and then do one round of future tapping. Fourth, I do work on whatever pressing issue there is in my life (e.g. a new job, relationship with someone). This is some area of my life that needs work, but isn't going to happen in just one session. Finally, I do a round of thanksgiving tapping.
This is a routine that might be way more involved than what is right for you, but having a game plan is helpful to make sure you make good use of your time.
Also, this is not set in stone. If I find there is something else I need to do with my time, I can do it, but it is a good starting point.
4) Don't get to ambitious when creating a routine.
When you are creating a routine, start small. The quickest way to stop doing a routine is to fail at doing the routine. If you try and duplicate the routine articulated in point to as a starting point, it is going to be too much. When you are first creating a your routine, make it as simple at just working on your aches and pains while you are laying in bed right before you fall asleep. After you have done this for a week or two, add another component to your routine.
Learn EFT | Submit a question
It is very funny. When friends, family and clients are sharing with me something that has happened in the past week, I almost always ask, "Did you tap in it?" Inevitably they respond, "I always forget."
Initially, in my practice, I found that very few clients where doing the homework we had agreed upon. As I started to investigate this, generally the response was as simple as, "I forgot." In response to this, I started to not only give homework, but give the time they should be doing the home work (e.g. sitting in the car before walking in to work, right before bed, while taking a morning walk).
Basically, with out saying this, we were creating an EFT routine. Here is an example of a routine for one of my clients "Jane".
Jane works for an agency that places and supports children in the foster care system. It is a job that can be emotional at times because of the nature of their clients. It is stressful because they are trying to do so much with limited resources. Because of this Jane was taking quite a bit of anxiousness home from work.
The routine we created was very simple. Each day before she left work she would make a stop in the restroom. She would go into one of the stalls and do EFT for five to ten minutes. She would address any emotions she had at that moment, as well as take a quick review of the day to see if there was anything she needed to clean up. Then, symbolically, she would flush the toilet to show her self that she had gotten rid of all the carp she was carrying around.
We very intentionally chose her work place as the place she was going to do the work. Her concern was that she was bringing the emotion from work home with her. We very easily could have had her waited until she got home before she did the work. There are two problems with this. First, by waiting until she got home she was bringing the emotion home (which is what we were trying to fix). Second, it was very easy to get distracted when she got home. There was the dog to take care of, her husband to greet and spend time with and dinner to fix. It would be very easy to get distracted with all that was happening at home and not get to the EFT work she needed to do.
By having her do the EFT at her work place we were able to take care of both of these problems. First, doing the EFT at work, all of the emotion associated with the job was not leaving work. Second, by making it part of her exit routine from the office there was no way she was going to get distracted from the doing EFT. It simply became one more step to getting out the door, like turning off her computer, packing her back, and turning the voice mail on.
Here are a few things to consider when creating an EFT routine.
1) Do it at the same time everyday.
There are going to be moments when we need to do EFT right now, but for the most part we are able to deal with most things with some time set aside for work. Look at how well we brush our teeth. Every night before we go to bed, the last thing we all do is brush our teeth. I know I don't think why I am doing, it is just part of the routine. It is much easier to do any sort of maintenance for hour health when it is done at a regular time. This is true for brushing our teeth, going to the gym, or doing EFT.
2) Do it in the same place every time.
Now this might be possible, but I have found it is very helpful to have a consistent location. I have a special chair in which I do all of my prayer, meditation, and EFT in. The only thing I use the chair for is these activities. Because I have set space aside for these activities, the moment I start moving towards my body, mind, and spirit know what is coming. I immediately start to feel relaxed because I know what is coming next.
You don't have to have a special place in which the only thing you do there is EFT, but by having a consistent location (in bed, the kitchen table, the porch swing) you more likely to do it.
Also, it is important to pick a place where you are not going to be distracted. In the living room, while the kids are watching TV might not be the best choice.
3) Have a game plan when you sit down.
I have found it helpful to have a plan when I sit down to do EFT. For me it looks something like this. First, I scan my body for any aches and pains and do work on them first. Second, I review my day to see what residual emotions are kicking around. Third, I think about what is happening tomorrow. I see if I am worried about what is to come and then do one round of future tapping. Fourth, I do work on whatever pressing issue there is in my life (e.g. a new job, relationship with someone). This is some area of my life that needs work, but isn't going to happen in just one session. Finally, I do a round of thanksgiving tapping.
This is a routine that might be way more involved than what is right for you, but having a game plan is helpful to make sure you make good use of your time.
Also, this is not set in stone. If I find there is something else I need to do with my time, I can do it, but it is a good starting point.
4) Don't get to ambitious when creating a routine.
When you are creating a routine, start small. The quickest way to stop doing a routine is to fail at doing the routine. If you try and duplicate the routine articulated in point to as a starting point, it is going to be too much. When you are first creating a your routine, make it as simple at just working on your aches and pains while you are laying in bed right before you fall asleep. After you have done this for a week or two, add another component to your routine.
Learn EFT | Submit a question
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